Friday, February 28, 2014

Learning, growing, changing.....

I cannot believe it has been another month since I have had the chance to write a blog post! I have been on my 12 week plan and working hard. That has included getting up at 4:30 to do fasted cardio, weight training 4-5 days a week, and then sometimes cardio after. It also involves a lot of meal prep. I have been a busy girl.

I have had great results. I lost another inch and lost another 3 lbs since my last post. So, the total is 13 inches and 11 pounds. I am truly thankful I came across Wendy and Cyber Body Shop and went on this journey to start my weight loss and get my mind right again. I have learned a lot! I know how to incoporate protein into my diet now, I know that I don't have to let food control me, I don't need to drink every weekend and sometimes not at all (this is a HUGE change for me!), I can lift weights, I CAN get up in the morning and workout- it IS possible, and I know that a lifestyle change is something I want to continue with. *more below* 

There was only one time on my 12 week plan that I knew I was not going to be able to stick to my meal plan and training. That time was last weekend. I take a trip every year with friends to New Orleans for Mardi Gras. It is an absolute blast. We have so much fun! I knew I was going to want to indulge in the foods I love there and I knew I would drink- JESTERS ARE THE BEST THING SINCE SLICED BREAD! LOL! So, I got up Thursday morning and did an hour of cardio and that night we headed to NOLA. I didn't pack my workout clothes, I didn't pack any food, I fully planned to enjoy myself and I did. I ate what I wanted, I drank what I wanted and I didn't hit the gym once. I got all my cravings out of the way. Every bite and every moment was worth it. I think I enjoyed it more, because I knew it wasn't an everyday thing and I knew that I would come home and get back to my new normal routine. There are times in life when you realize that life is too short to stress and I didn't stress about it- I just enjoyed it! :) I planned to workout when I got home Sunday, but I was so tired and just rested. Monday morning I got up and got back to it. I went back to my normal foods and workout routine without a thought. I weighed in at 166 and I FREAKED OUT but just for a moment. I knew it would go away. And you know what? It DID! I weighed in this morning at 158- so 1 lb gain for ALL that I ate- I'll take it! And that 1 lb will be GONE very very soon. So, don't let worrying over weight gain ruin a vacation or time with friends and family- we all have to live! Life really is too short! :) 



So, when I got back I was also faced with decisions. My 12 weeks is coming to an end and I had to decide if I was going to continue on the same plan or if I was going to take a break, venture on my own, choose something else... it is a big decision because it is an investment of time and money. I paid $750 for my 12 week program. I learned a lot and while I am happy with my progress, I started thinking about doing it again for another 12 weeks. I started thinking about fasted cardio at 4:30 a.m., eating fish and chicken and vegetables, spending money on supplements, missing out on things because I am afraid to go out to eat because they may put butter on my food or seasoning that will bloat me, staying home all the time, secluding myself from the world... and I just cried thinking about it. I want to lead a healthy life, I want to work hard and push myself, I want to eat better, I want to make better choices, but I don't want life to pass me by while doing it. Don't get me wrong, I am in control and I could have done whatever I wanted in those 12 weeks, but I wanted to give it my all. I wanted to try to do my best and that meant taking food with me or staying home. That meant 4:30 a.m. alarms. That meant saying no to going places. I was never forced to do that, I decided to. The bottom line is I can't do that anymore. I can't continue on that path. I can't eat the same things over and over again. I am just not wired that way. I have done my research on different programs, different ways of life, coaches.. I have e-mailed, I have asked a lot of questions, I have taken time to reflect on what I want to do. Throughout the process I went through, I learned a lot but I still have a lot to learn. I have decided not to re-sign with my current coach. The program is great for some people, but not me. If I was going to compete, I would call them back up for sure, because they do a great job. For what I am looking for, I need something different. I have decided to go the IIFYM route. I will try and write a more detailed post really soon on what that means and who I will be working with. I am excited. I am ready to start a new challenge. More importantly, I am excited to be able to sleep in the mornings, not wear myself thin, learn more, go out to eat, get to live a little better, eat whatever I want if it fits my macros, make good choices, see my body change and embark on a new journey. The bottom line is that you have to try things, experience it, there will be trial and error, you will fail.. you will discover along the way what will work for you and what won't. I don't think we ever truly FAIL, as long as you keep trying. I may try this for 3 months and it might not be for me, but I do know that I am trying. I am one step closer to finding that lifestyle change that is for me. If I can do it, you can. It will take time, money, effort, tears, and sweat, but it WILL be worth it!